She stares at her hands,
they shake..showing the fear she dares not voice.
She wants to give in to reckless abandon,
to be herself,
Her experiences have been cruel lessons.
Dare she trust again?
Become lost in the sweetness of the moment again?
A wave hits her,
she can’t resist the force.
Her hands curl into fists.
To be oneself is to be rebuked.
To act out of expected norms is to seek punishment.
She is trapped in her fear.
Her longing daring her to break free,
but its not quite enough.
What to do?
What to feel?
What to think?
What to say?
These things she no longer knows.